Smakk Talk

why just talk if you can talk smakk

Thursday, July 27, 2006

Patio Smakk
Was I really driving a damn Home Depot truck full of patio furniture tonight? How did I become Patio Furniture Delivery Guy? And worse yet, I didn't get my first drink until after 8pm. Is this what it means to own a freakin' house. I've owned other houses and I don't remember it invading my non-sobriety time so much. And since I don't remember, then I know it didn't. The purpose of the damn keg fridge was to have more beer time.
This is crazy! It's after 9pm and I understand myself. Things in the room are not dancing little jigs. I'm have no desire to text Wu or Loops about random things. TV is extremely boring. Carrot is not having a converstaion with me. When the hell did I move into a house? Bunny is sleeping. (ok, it is after 9pm.) There is still ice in the freezer. It takes less than 3 minutes to walk to the fridge. I can't remember the last time I went to the bathroom. Is this what it's like for sober people? Sick...just sick.

Wednesday, July 26, 2006

Grill Smakk
Bought the keg & grill tonight. Hmmm...did I really need a grill that had a 45 burger capacity? I'm sure we will find out. And yes Loops, there is a Grill Delivery & Install Guy. But I tapped keg myself. Some skills seem to be natural....
Club 6850 Pre-Grand Opening Smakk
Looks like we may be having a test run of many throwdowns to come this Sat at Club 6850. Though the Club is still undergoing some remodeling - the pool is clean, the bar is stocked and the Kegger is working. So that's enough for us to throw a little pre-pre-party before our crew of 16 head down to the Journey/Def Leopard show on Sat night. So if you're in the Prestonwood area this Saturday afternoon, please ignore the sudden prescence of the riot squad lobbing tear gas grenades and firing rubber bullets and bean bags in the once quiet little community. We just call that the weekend....

Tuesday, July 25, 2006

Guy Smakk con't
How many Pool Guys does it take to change out the light in Smakk's new pool? Well at least two. I have to sit around my house today for 3 hours while this guy is changing the light in my pool. He's completely underwater with both legs coming out the top hitting the diving board trying to wire the light in upside down and underwater. He finally gets it wired after about an hour and half and then spends another hour trying to screw the light into the wall. He finally calls his boss to come out and enjoy some pool time in Aqua Smakk with him and help get the light in. I finally take off to head back to the office. Probably be some service techs having a cook out and splashdown going on by the time I get back to the club tonight. Jeez...
Guy Smakk
Now that I have bought Club 6850, there are these freakin' guys in my life:

Pool Guy
Yard Guys
Appliance Delivery Guys
Refrigerator Repair Guy
Dryer Repair Guy
Painter Guys
Carpet Guys
Direct TV Guy
Comcast Guy
Gas Guy
Mattress Delivery Guys

Jesus. Could we get just one bunny that has a blue collar job????

Monday, July 24, 2006

Kegerator Smakk
With the opening of Club 6850, one of my first official purchases was the keg fridge from Best Buy. So on Saturday the little delivery guys show up with my new Kegger on the truck. They unpack the little guy from the box, strategically place him out by the pool per my request, and leave the boxes for me to install the tap and stuff. Then the delivery guy points out, "You may want to check this door out. It's not really sealing right and just comes right open."
So I rush over for the inspection. "Your right. It's not sealing at all. Should you take it back and bring me another?"
Delivery guy respnds, "If we do that it could be a couple weeks. (Audible GASP leaves my throat) The best thing is just set up a service call and they will come in person and fix it within 48 hours."
So the Bunny places the service call for me and the tech calls me back today. "Sorry sir. For any fridge less than 5.6 cubic feet you need to bring back to the store for service."
WTF? Like I'm going to cram Kegger in the back of my bemer and throw it over my shoulder while I skip into Best Buy. Instead I drive myself to Best Buy today to talk to the appliance guy about this BS. He gets on the phone with Best Buy Dis-Service Center and gets the same runaround. While he's haggling away I start to think about what makes the door seal shut anyway. When a fridge gets old the seal starts to let in the air around it and it won't seal shut good anymore. That's about the same time I start to realize that maybe Kegger isn't sealing shut because of the giant hole in the top of the fridge with all the escaping air because I haven't installed to the tap yet. Jesus...I need a beer. doooohhhh