Learned Smakk
New items I have learned as a father of one week:
1. There is a lot of blood during a c section
2. Babies look like white wrinkly lizards for the first 3 seconds of being born
3. Hold your newborn daughter tightly to avoid tossing her across the room when she scares you with a blast from her behind
4. Motor boating is no longer the main use for wife's boobs
5. Babies sense fear
6. Your children can be born with the ability to give the "what a dumb fuck" look
7. Your house is smaller than you think
8. You can never have enough wipes
9. Swaddling
10. Sleep is for the weak

Smakkette Smakk
The rumors are not true and I have not passed away or been in rehab. The reason I have been absent is because Smakkette finally arrived on 12/29 to join the Bunny & I. She is absolutely perfect and we are one very happy little family. In true form of joining the Smakk clan, she was even able to already start getting after me from day 1 just by being born. Coming out of the Bunny at a whopping 8lbs & 1 oz, here is how the comments came from almost every nurse at the hospital:

Nurse - Looking from Smakkette to Bunny, "Wow. I can't believe she was that big coming out of your tiny body."
Nurse - Then glancing over at me, "Ohhhhhhhh...I see. You're the father."

Smakkette 1 - Smakk 0. But we still got 18 years, 18 years.....