Noodling Smakk
I need no cable long as I got PBS. That's right - tonight I watched Okie Noodling. This is the lost sport of getting down in a creek bed, wiggling your fingers in a hole underwater, and grabbing a big catfish barehanded. I'm not talking a nice 8 or 10 lb cat to filet up for some din din, no these suckers are up to 70 pounds. Is it an insane sport targeting the backwoods white trash folks of the middle south? Hell yeah. I'm mean this weak targeted documentary tried to make these folks look like they just made Ned Beatty squel like a pig - but these guys are driving around the lake in new Bayliners just looking to snatch a little fish. Boy you should really smell my fingers!! I am so facinated by this sport - I've decided to try Skank Noodling. Wiggle my fingers out there with maybe a $2 bill or a "genuine" diamond, then once she bites - rip her up by the mouth and drag her to the grill. (Okay, the anger management is coming.) Now what I truly found offensive abut this whole sport is that is is illegal in all but four states. Yes, 46 states have decided fishing barehanded should be outlawed even though night scooping a deer while soaked in urine drenched fatigues is fine. For some reason I'm getting des ja vue but I'm too lazy to read my old posts. So let's repeat - fishing barehanded bad, fishing with bait scented hooks that rip their freakin lips off with a good tug is good. Anywya, I'm about to go shove my fist up a tuna (No, the skank's not here):
Top five fishing movies:
5. Running Scared (there's at least a 10 second fishing scene)
4. Jaws
3. Old Man in the Sea
2. On Golden Pond
1. A River Runs Through It

First he swims, then he jumps. Then he swims and then he jumps. Then I shove my fist down his throat...